irrelevant.

so a lot has been on my mind lately.

i have filled out and sent 3 college applications. widener is completely done. vmi is waiting on some papers i have to send in separate and Norwich probably thinks I'm trying to work the system because i accidentally sent my application without money. so needless to say... the moment iv waited for, for years has now become reality and i feel like iv messed up. I'm an outstanding student, cadet, and young adult both inside school and outside of school, but i still have a feeling i wont get accepted to any colleges. i look in the halls and see all of these people that have gotten into so many colleges and me? well as for me, I'm still waiting. unsure, unsettled, and feeling quite unwelcome to adulthood.

on another note, my friends and i have been planning our senior week and it is so much planning. its confusing but we are all excited.  were looking at staying in a condo that's about 2 blocks from the rides in OC. the place looks amazing! i have some mixed feelings about senior week though. all of my friends are going our separate ways. ill be going to college then into the military, two of my friends leave in July for USMC, some of my friends are going to an in state school and some are going in states that are far away. this is our last chance to spend some good quality time together and that makes me a little sad. actually, it makes me really sad. coming to seaford from laurel i had the mind set that i would just go to school for 4 years then leave with no close relationships with anyone but I'm really close with a lot of people and the thought of not seeing them for years scares and disappoints me. i know that if we all try to make time for each other it will work but a lot of us are looking/going/planning on a military life so its not realistic to just "take a weekend off". anyway, ill go and enjoy myself with my friends and as one wise person said, "don't cry because its over, smile because it happened."